by Dan Savage
Your a faggot.
—Women Obsess Real Men
Your new here, WORM, aren’t you?
Q: I’m a straight woman, and I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about eight months. We have a wonderful relationship and amazing sex. There’s one thing he does in the bedroom, however, that I find off-putting and I was hoping you might be able to provide some insight. About 25 percent of the time after he ejaculates, he briefly licks some of his come off his fingers. This kind of creeps me out. I’ve been with more than a few dudes, so I obviously understand that a woman eating their come is a common turn-on, but this is my first experience with this particular incarnation. At first I was worried my aversion might be rooted in some deeply buried homophobic beliefs, but we’ve discussed the idea of me pegging him, and that I can get behind. I think it’s more that this smacks of a certain egotism I find frivolous. Like, I wouldn’t go around shoving my fingers inside my pussy and rubbing the results all over my face. Typically we’re able to discuss any kind of conflict or confusion that arises between us, but this one seems tough to broach for me. Three questions: How common is this? Do I need to just get over it or should I try to talk to him about it? Would most guys suck their own dick if they were able? — Yearning Understanding Concerning Kink
1. It’s not common, YUCK, but it’s not unheard of, either. Maybe your boyfriend grew up with sex-phobic parents who blew up at the sight of a crusty sock — so he opted to destroy the evidence by eating it and developed a taste for it. Maybe he thinks his semen contains powerful woo-hoo-y masculine energy and wishes to retain some of it. Maybe he had a girlfriend who thought it was hot to see him eat his come and he (wrongly) assumes it’s a turn-on for you, too.
2. Yes, you need to get over it and, yes, you should ask him about it. The former almost certainly requires the latter.
3. Every man on earth tries, a select few succeed, and we all would if we could. Even my new friend WORM.