|THE BEST SHOW EVER|
JEFF: I won a radio contest in 1990 and the prize was a front-row seat and a backstage pass for Milli Vanilli at the Freeman Colluseum. Meeting video gods Rob and Fab in the spandex-coated flesh was enough to make the night unforgettable, but their performance made it even more so.
The show began in the dark, with scary-sounding synthesizer music. The lights came up just enough to reveal a stage full of evil ninjas lurking around in the fog. A spot hit stage left at the top of a stairwell to reveal Rob, ready for action. The keyboard player hit one of those “Owner of a Lonely Heart”-HANK! samples, and the crowd let out a scream. A second spot hit stage right, and HANK! — it’s Fab! Another screeeeaaamm! Rob and Fab ran down the stairs, leapt into midair for a combination chestbump high-five, landed in fighting position, and started kicking some serious ninja ass.
After all the evil-doers were devastated, the Vanillis met again center-stage for their patented running-in-place-thing along with the snare drum intro for “Don’t Forget My Number.” As the band kicked in, the crowd went insane. It was irresistable. I put my cool on hold and joined in with the screaming.
The rumor had been out for a while about Milli Vanilli faking thier vocals, but you couldn’t tell. They did an excellent job faking ‘em, and their show was an enjoyable illusion. The whole experience — the bubblegum funk, the hair extensions, the bike shorts, the dancing, the arena full of crazed screaming teenyboppers, the two nuts lipsynching “Blame It On The Rain” — was totally hyperreal.
Jessica and Jeff DeCuir make up the electro-pop duo Hyperbubble.