| Yngwie Malmsteen|
It doesn't speak well for the state of Yngwie's recording career that mp3s of his eight-mile-high meltdown - recorded by a member of his entourage - attracted more listener interest than any of his recent musical endeavors. But it shouldn't really be a surprise. Yngwie is a product of the '80s, the heyday for guitar excess. While other metalheads offered their allegiance to Randy Rhoads or Eddie Van Halen, Yngwie fans stood out from the pack. They refused to accept radio-sanctioned guitar heroes. They wanted secret six-string messiahs, and Yngwie was their man.
| Yngwie Malmsteen
Saturday, March 6
2718 N. St. Mary's
But every dorky teen metalhead eventually grows out of the phase where he considers it worth debating which guitarist plays the fastest. In 2004, Yngwie looks only slightly cooler than Yanni. So here's my question: If a male-menopausal guitar stud unleashes the fucking fury, and no one hears it, does he still make a sound? •