Assclown Alert: Unpacking Patrick Von Dohlen's absurd allegations against Councilman John Courage

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District 9 council candidate Patrick Von Dohlen clearly has no problem injecting partisanship into city elections. - FACEBOOK / VOTE PATRICK
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  • District 9 council candidate Patrick Von Dohlen clearly has no problem injecting partisanship into city elections.
Assclown Alert is a column of opinion, analysis and snark.

San Antonio Councilman John Courage may be a lot of things — a retired teacher, a former Air Force police officer and a guy with some progressive ideas elected in the traditionally conservative-leaning District 9.



But one thing we’re pretty sure he isn’t, is a Marxist.

Yet Patrick Von Dohlen, Courage’s opponent in the June 5 runoff, has accused him of being just that. Von Dohlen has also alleged that his rival wants to defund the police and supports “federally funded abortion on demand,” according to an Express-News report cataloging the candidate’s increasingly absurd accusations against his opponent.



As if that rhetoric wasn’t overheated enough, Von Dohlen — a financial advisor with a history of anti-LGBTQ+ rhetoric who already ran two losing races against Courage — last week made unsubstantiated claims that his rival sought help from “gun-grabbing” Beto O’Rourke and “ultra-leftist” Wendy Davis, the daily reports.

Although Von Dohlen didn’t return the Express-News’ calls requesting comment, the motivation behind his desperation move is clear. Sensing the polarized mood in national politics, he’s trying to gin up fear that Courage, who’s run a nonpartisan campaign, is a leftist boogeyman.

That Von Dohlen couldn’t gain traction against Courage in 2017 and 2019 and only ended up ended up with 36% of the vote to Courage’s 47% in the four-candidate May 1 contest suggests the strategy won’t bear fruit.

But, hey, at least Von Dohlen outed himself as an assclown unfit for office.

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